For weeks leading up to MAL I have been chatting with a man from NYC who is into erotic hypnosis and hypnotic bondage. I had heard of Neil the Erotic Hypnotist based on the recommendations of some friends. I am going to attempt, as best as I can to describe the experience I had with him, which counts up in one of the most amazing kink experiences ever.
You can read up on the experiences of a very hot little pup, Bo, on his blog. A great read and gives a highlight of a very similar experience, though given mine was in the middle of an event I will be focusing more of what was unique to my experience. I think it is good for those that are unfamiliar with his blog post, however, to read it before continuing as his post is what inspired me to contact Neil and seek this out.
I will also begin with a caveat. There are those that don’t believe what I am writing to be possible, real or chalk it up to mystic voodoo. For you, if you want to read on with a skeptical mind, feel free to feel that way, I am not going to try to convince you otherwise. All I can tell you is that my feelings were similar enough to understand how you feel, and my husband I believe was in your camp as well. Not now. Not after this weekend.
If after reading this you still need to be convinced, check out Neil’s FAQ.
For weeks ahead of meeting him in person we spent time talking online. Not always about hypno, or about the erotic parts of hypno, but just things in general. There area a few things that I tell every newbie out there regarding how to get their feet wet in kink, one of them is enjoy who you submit to as a person rather than just how hot they are. If you are just looking to get off, have them stick a dick up your ass and be done with it. If you want to have your mind blown, your soul changed, your insides moved, and have the best damn sexual experience you ever have in the world, then make sure you at least like the person you are playing with.
With Neil, it is easy. He answered all my questions and is just a very easy guy to talk to overall. And in person, the first night of MAL when I met him for the first time, it proved to continue to be true. One word I use often to describe people that I really like is genuine, probably because I have never been that great at seeing through BS (no, I don’t want to play poker with you now). He really is a genuine guy, open about what he is and what he isn’t into. So after talking with him a little Friday night, we agreed to meet up on Saturday afternoon for the session to begin.
I arrived to his room at the agreed time, and we spend a lot of time talking about what hypno is, what it is not, and some of the myths everyone has about it. We had a long discussion, and I felt more and more comfortable as we chatted, easily able to open up and give him ideas of what I was thinking at that moment and listen to what he had to say.
Rather than spending time on the process, which in some ways I remember really well and in others not so much, I am going to get more into the action of what happened and the reactions it was producing in me.
When it was time to begin we agreed on what we were going to do during the session, some of which was from a therapeutic perspective. One of those I can share, since I think it is integral to the story, is body image issues.
I have never been happy with my body. When one thing is working, something else bothers me. Growing up with flaming read hair and very pronounced freckles makes you a target for other kids ridicule, but when I got comfortable with that something else comes up. A good example is my nips. They have always stuck out, a lot. In middle school I dreaded Shirts & Skins games in PE as I knew I was going to be made fun of for them. However, once I came out I learned there are a lot of guys that are into big nips, especially because they are really chewable and really connected (yes, I have cum from just getting my nips chewed with no one touching my dick). As with my red hair, discovering a part I was self conscience about to be a turn on for guys I liked didn’t mean it went away, it just went elsewhere.
So I wanted some help with feeling more comfortable with my body, and that became a part of what we agreed to. I was nervous prior to meeting about this, especially given how much I found Neil to be a really hot guy. At one point he sent to me a photo of him in under armour to me, my biggest weaknesses. He has a great chest, which is one of my favorite things on a guy. So from the beginning I intimidated about playing with someone I found to be so hot.
Additionally we added some discussion about the fun part, hypno bondage. Now, as some of you may have noticed, I am into heavy bondage. Some would say scary bondage. Fully confined gets me off. So the idea of nothing confining me at all seemed a little far fetched. Not that it wasn’t possible, just not possible for me. I was even concerned that if it did work I wouldn’t get off on it as I wasn’t surrounded with the usual amounts of rubber and chain and other toys.
How wrong I was.
When we started I was in my rubber gear, though just a little. A pair of cod-piece front shorts and a yellow zip front muscle shirt. He had me lay down on the bed and we began with him talking me through relaxing and listening to him. As he had encouraged me to do, when my mind wandered I let it, and there were times when I caught myself wondering what he was saying. In the very relaxed atmosphere so I just wasn’t always processing what he was telling me to do.
After him putting me under a few times and taking me back out a few times, the first to test how I was doing, the others to do some of the therapeutic suggestions we agreed to. At one point he woke me up and I told him I had to piss, so he said go ahead. Here is the first time my mind was blown, and what felt like previously were moments of doubt were starting to melt away.
As I walked to the bathroom in my rubber gear I knew, with my conscious mind that there was something he wanted me to do, and I knew that I knew what it was, but I really needed to piss at that moment, so I was telling myself I will get to it in a moment, just pee first. Then I started thinking, you know, I am not sure if this is working, am I going under or do I just think I am.
Off comes the rubber shirt.
Now I am thinking, glad I took that off, that is much better. The confining rubber around my shoulders was probably distracting me. I finish the piss, then…
Off comes the shorts.
After putting the shorts with the shirt on the sink, I returned back to the bed in the other room, completely naked.
Now, at this point, of those that have played with me, try to think of if you have ever really seen me naked. If you have it was because I was putting something on or taking them off (unless we were in a relationship, hehe). So in I walk back to the room leaving my rubber gear behind, and blop back over on the bed, when that feeling that there was something I was supposed to do came back, but this time really strong.
I am going to take a moment to describe this moment in a way that really captures it, because this really tossed my mind about in my skull.
Have you ever been talking about a movie or TV show, and someone asks what the name of the star is, and you just have the name and you know you know it, but can’t get it out. Tip of the tongue. The idea that there was something I was supposed to do, that he wanted me to do, was very strong and I knew I know what it was, it was on the tip of my tongue. That is what it was like when I laid down, but when I looked up into his eyes, and saw this smile, I knew what it was. Just like that moment when you suddenly remember an actors name, I suddenly remember what it was that he told me to do when I was under.
I was to take off all my clothes.
Earlier he and I talked about the difference between the conscious mind and the subconscious mind. My mind, my conscious part of the brain was telling me a series of things to do because I needed to do them that led me to the event my subconscious was directed to do by Neil when I was last under. He told me when I would next wake up I would want to take off all the rest of my clothes. So when I woke I had an event that needed to get me to a place where I would take off my clothes.
The part that was the odd part, the one that took my doubt away, was when he smiled at me after I looked up at him on that bed, completely naked. The memory of him telling me when I was under to take my clothes off after I woke, and that I would remember that I would when he asked me about it but not before, well, that was the kicker. It wasn’t that I didn’t remember, it was that a part of my brain was telling my conscious mind, don’t worry about it, we will think about that later, first pee. Then, I should take this shirt off, then we can think about it, well, there are the pants to, then we can remember. I don’t want to stand in this bathroom like a weirdo while standing there ponder what it was that I was to be doing, so I will just go back in the bedroom area and we can figure it out, that bed is inviting, lets hop on up there, look at Neil… Holy shit that fucking worked!
So now, when it was time to go under again, I was ready to go!
Again, I am not going to go into the process of what happened next, but I will take a few moments to describe what the results where, especially the next best part of the experience that kept fucking with my head: Cuffs.
After he gave the hypnotic suggestion of Cuffs and I was brought back to being fully awake and out of the hypnotic state he could pull both of my wrists together and tap my wrists, then say “cuffs”. The result was I couldn’t separate my hands.
Now, even with the naked thing earlier, I was skeptical of the bondage part the most, and again I was surprised with the reaction. I have experienced heavy poppers, oxygen deprivation, even chloroform, all of which prevented me from having control of my body. In those cases my mind was unable to make commands of my body, that wasn’t it at all. Here my mind was fine, I was fully awake and able to think like normal, but willing my hands apart was not resulting in it happening.
At first, I was experiencing this feeling like, ok, sure it works a little, but it can’t last. I just have to try harder. I tried breathing calmly, I tried straining, I even tried relaxing figuring it was some sort of Chinese finger cuff trick, all didn’t work. My arms just decided, naw, I am going to stay where they are.
I was getting all subby before that, which is a fun headspace to be in and one that I have done a lot, but when he put my wrists together for the first time, and gave that devil smile of delight as he watched me realize everything he had been telling me for weeks was true, that is when I dropped in full sub mode.
He demonstrated a few other things as well, all of which was so fun to experience, but I am going to skip ahead a little bit to the next best part of the sessions. There were two more hypnotic suggestions I should explain. One was Control, where he would touch me in a certain spot and then say Control, followed by a command to follow. The other was Horny, where he would do a similar touch, say Horny then give a number from 1 to 10 to tell me how horny I was.
I could tell he was getting off on the control as much as I was, and with Cuffs in place with my wrists behind my back, he gave me Horny 10, which made me want to do everything. I would have fucked a tree if it was nearby. It didn’t just turn on like a light bulb, more like someone putting down the gas pedal slowly and steadily, and away I went. He then gave me Control, and told me to suck his cock.
Now, I feel every boy needs to have a goal, something to accomplish (not every Dom agrees, that is fine, it is my belief) and one of mine was to blow this man to his satisfaction, especially knowing he loved that. Sure, I have had my share of cock in my mouth, but I don’t remember ever getting anyone off with just mouth. My husband is amazing at it, and I often am jealous of his ability to suck cock. I just didn’t get that gay gene.
So when I was commanded to blow Neil, it was all I wanted to do, and I was rock hard doing it. The more I blew him, the more I tasted his cock and felt/heard his reactions to my attention, all the while pulling on my unrestrained but uncooperative wrists behind my back, I just kept getting harder. I can get off on pain, a skill I acquired only in the last couple of years, but never have I had pain on my cock from just being hard without a cock ring. In fact, that is exactly what it felt like, having a too tight metal cock ring on. The closer he got the harder I got, the more painful it was, the more hot I was.
I want to describe the wave of feeling of what happened next. In my line of work I have been integral part of the production team for large events. I have stood on the floor of an arena and watch an audience screen and cheer to the work I did. I have met celebrities of all kinds, seen sides of notables that no one knows about. I have climbed the inside of the Super Dome, and been on the set of one of the most famous, long running television shows in the country. Imagine what it is like to feel that level of pride in what you do.
When I felt his load hit my mouth, I felt the same thing, that exact same feeling of disbelief I get to be a part of this, and that I am having a moment that never happened before and will never happen again like that. I sucked that man off and was fucking getting off on it. I just had this huge wave of, holy fuck yea that was awesome.
What followed was a bit of other play, then did we did one last follow up moment of me going under. He gave me some more suggestions, and I remember it best because I was on such a high at that moment. Once I was under he left a suggestions in my subconscious to reinforce some of the other items we had done earlier, as well as adding that I would feel happy and energetic and horny for the rest of the night.
Now, the rest of the evening I am going to have to follow up in another post, as it was truly a unique experience and truly a memorable one! But a couple of additional detail before signing off this post.
The happy, energetic and horny suggestion certainly worked. I met back up with my husband, and we did some shopping in the mart (can’t wait to share about some of the pieces I get there!). The entire time we were doing that, as well as dinner after with some friends, and the lobby hangout after, I was bouncy. Very bouncy.
I drink my caffeine through Diet Coke, but have done coffee before I swore off it. This doesn’t compare. It was a natural high of energy. I was literally bouncing and chatty, humming and darting my attention all around. My husband accurately described my behavior that night like being drunk without the negative side of it, though I might take it a step further and say it was like experiencing a runner’s high without the bother of running. The suggestion of being happy and energetic worked and I just rode with it.
Now, I must break for a while from this post. I know it is incredibly long, but there was so much to tell, and much more to go. I will continue in the next part.